When Alexis was an infant, we did the whole “tough love” thing and let her cry sometimes at night so she learned she could put herself back to sleep. It worked beautifully and she slept through the night from a very early age. However, since Branwen has been born, both of them have been waking up in the night. Why is this happening? Because Joel and I are afraid to let them cry since that might wake the other one.
This is a tough one. Of course we don’t want one of them to wake the other one up. That would mean we’d have to get them both back to sleep at the same time, plus it would make for tired kids the next day; however, not letting them cry at all also means they’re now learning that if they wake up all they have to do is start fussing a little bit and Mommy or Daddy will run in to comfort them. What’s the solution? Well, we’ve decided to kill the baby monitor, at least at night. (It’s still handy for naps during the day when we’re downstairs.)
The way our house is laid out, our room and the girls room is part of a loop including a walk-through bathroom and a hallway. In other words, there are two doors out of our room, one going through the bathroom into the girls’ room, and the other going out to the hallway where you can either go downstairs or go into the girls’ room. The girls are really not that far away. If the monitor is off, we won’t hear them fuss lightly, but we’ll still hear them if they really need us. Will they wake each other up with their fussing? Probably. But I’m thinking it’s best if they learn to sleep through each other’s fussings anyway.
It seems like this problem probably took care of itself when I was growing up since monitors were not nearly as common. My mother just kept an ear out for us from wherever she was. She didn’t have a monitor by her bed or even downstairs to hear us when we were supposed to be sleeping. Of course, my sister and I didn’t have to share a room. Technically our girls don’t, either, since we have another bedroom on our 2nd floor (their room is on the 3rd), but that room is currently a storage room and will eventually be a bedroom for future children of which we’d like several. This being the case, it seems best to get them used to sharing a room right off the bat.
Speaking of the monitor still being handy during nap time, I think I need to go get Alexis. She didn’t sleep long enough, but at least she took a little nap today. Hopefully, she’ll sleep through Branwen’s fussing tonight. 🙂